"Let's re-new the bathroom." She commented.
"That's a good idea!" I joked, thinking she was joking.
"When will you be starting?" She said un-jokingly.
"Wha…? I've just finished the car parking!" I wailed.
"See? Finished. Nothing to do now then." She simpered.
"Suppose I could paint the ceiling." I offered condescendingly.
"I be thinking more of re-tiling walls, take up pretend wood floor and put down tiles. Oh, and take away bath, we only stand in him to use shower, and put in proper shower box. I be thinking more like that than just paint ceiling. But paint ceiling as well."
"Wha……?" I wailed. "Shower box? You mean a cubicle? Or enclosure?"
"Wha…..?" Was the blank response.
Past few days we, and I use the term 'we' in the singular, have been choosing a shower cubicle and tiles. All I've been doing, sulkily, is using my diplomatic skills to subtly guide 'my little nest of vipers' away from tiles that had any form of outrageously fluorescent floral finish, and on to the more traditional boring British beige.
As you'll remember, my plumbing ability is about as slick as a kitten with a ball of wool, so I'm attempting to figure out what I'll need, and what to do with what I'll need, via the World Wide Web. Could be World Wide Webbed Feet if I get it wrong.
Quote; Granni Nazzano.
"My only hobby is laziness, which naturally rules out all others."
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