22 Apr 2017

And Then, No Goal...

Before reading further, please prepare, and have to hand for later, a roll of baking foil or, at a minimum, two square feet of same.

So, as they like to start, there’s the Con party right in front of an open electoral goal and what do they do? Kick the ball way back down the pitch towards their own goal by announcing they will continue loaning money to send overseas to fund girl bands and the like, probably scrap the pension triple-lock and possibly ask us all to pay more tax on this, that and the other.

Okay, they rowed back a tad next day but that won’t work. The headline weed seeds have been sown by the MSM banner headlines and duly noted by the party faithful and the undecided who may well now be wobbling away from the Cons – “They’re going to do what now?” – and any weed killer the MSM choose to use will be sparsely sprayed way down on page seven. 

Please note, this is the time to fashion some sort of conspiracy theory head protection from the foil you prepared earlier.

Could there be a more sinister game afoot? What if Teaser Maybe, despite all her fine words, doesn’t want a bigger majority at all, but rather wants a smaller majority or, heaven forefend, even another coalition? What then? The day after, all she has to do is call the real leaders of our Universe over in Brussels am Berlin and inform them that rather than an increased majority to endorse the first Brexit vote, she now has a reduced majority so it would appear the great unwashed have changed their minds so could you either go to your ‘In’ tray, find that A-50 thingy we sent a little bit after a while ago and run it through your shredded please. Or we could just go for the softest of the softest ‘out’ options, thus saving a little face and basically staying ‘in’ all but calling it ‘out’ as it looks like that’s what ‘they’ want now. Much two-way chuckling on the line. As for all the time you’ve wasted over there, please sent an invoice to cover for all the inconvenience this has caused. Say what now? It’ll be a big one? Much two-way hearty laughter on the line.

It’ll never happen like that, right? But I’m going to bookmark this post just in case. Please feel free to discard your foil hat.

Quote;  Milton Friedman.

“Only government can take perfectly good paper, cover it with perfectly good ink and make the combination worthless.”


Caratacus said...

Coo ... and they call me Old Mr. Cynical; but you reflect my own thoughts on the matter almost to a T. Mind you, I wouldn't be too cheery a PM if my name was an anagram of The Arse May (h/t The Slog).

Mac said...

The Arse May says so much and some would say she says too much...
A healthy dose of cynicism has never hurt the likes of us and it’s a sure safeguard against disappointment. Sadly, we now we have generations that actually believe the slogan, ‘it does exactly what it says on the tin’. We know it doesn’t.
Be of good cheer.