And Then A Nail...

It’s Sunday so just a quick paste jobbie – is it still legal to do that?  - in case you didn’t see this comment this morning over at John Redwood’s site. Is it still legal to link to other places? I get confused. Anyhoo, many of the comments are, as seems usual, rather scathing of our lady leader and her parties poor performance in general.

It seems the author of this comment, Duncan, didn’t have a heavy hammer to hand but saw before him a nail requiring a swift whack and this he achieved, in the absence of a hammer,  via a few deft blows to his keyboard. Well said that man. Sorry; well said that person...

   I’m not concerned with May’s public statements as such political devices tell us absolutely nothing about what is really happening behind closed doors.
   What we saw on Friday was utterly concocted, deliberate and a charade. Barnier, Merkel and May are on the same page and all are conspiring to ensure total continuity after March 2019.
   This British PM is utterly devoid of sincerity. She’s a ruthless political animal without any appreciation of that most fundamental of all human qualities, morals. Doing the right thing and knowing it’s the right thing to do is fundamental to how we are. May will never understand this
   The EU (Germany – Merkel) do not want the UK (May) to leave the EU. May doesn’t want the UK to leave the EU. May and Merkel are on the same page. Do not expect the UK to leave the EU in March 2019.
May will find some reason as to why this won’t happen.
   Most Tory voters have had enough of this PM and her pandering to all and sundry. It’s time for a PM that embraces the UK, its history, its culture and its heritage. No more trotting off to Africa on virtue signalling exercises. No more trotting off to see Merkel with her begging bowl and humiliating the UK in the process. No more pandering to vocal and vexatious rights activists. No more attacks on our freedoms and liberties using the social control mechanisms of PC and identity politics –
   Come on Tory MPs, let’s have a proper PM that stands up for the UK, its people and its freedoms

As that the extreme Labour conference is taking place, I note that, although seemingly missing the UKIP conference, the MSM is in full-on ‘back the nutters’ mode. Let’s see if they are as quick to highlight the speeches of any extreme Cons when they speak. Pardon? No such righty animal in government you say? Oh. Yet they cry about the  ‘rise of the far right’, right?

Quote;  Viktor Orbán.

“They want to dissolve Europe. They want to take away our own life and change it to something which is not our life.”

And Then I Resolve A Problem...

If you’re wondering, for some strange reason, where I’ve been since Wednesday, wonder no more as I’m delighted to announce that my little nest of vipers had a lottery win.

Great eh? Let me tell you, after the initial euphoria has passed it’s just one headache after another. Such as? Such as, what to do with the money. Which banks are one hundred percent safe? Any? If we get a lefty government soon – okay, a more lefty government – how much of everyone's money will they decide is actually theirs to share and lift it without warning? Stocks and shocks? Same conclusion as the above.

Keep the money under the bed? Buy gold? Physical or paper? If physical, where to keep it? Under the bed? So many headaches.

Need financial advisers I guess. More than one I guess. Tax advisers? I would guess so. Quite a few. So much to guess about.

I sat back and pondered all the above options with trepidation and after careful review opted for the option not mentioned above. And that would be? I suggested she walked down to the corner shop and collected her entire winnings of twenty five pounds and spent it then and there, frivolously, on a few frivolities.

As further a note, and as previously mentioned, her indoors is still convinced she’s a winner and no amount of explaining, with or without the aid of PowerPoint presentations, will convince her that she hasn’t won a damn bean but merely got back a minute fraction of the money she’s already ‘invested’ in the buying of lottery tickets. Which reminds me; I need to get out and buy a couple of lottery tickets for tonight...

Better than a lucky dip?

Quote;  George Orwell.

“The Lottery, with its weekly pay-out of enormous prizes, was the one public event to which the proles paid serious attention. It was probable that there were some millions of proles for whom the Lottery was the principal if not the only reason for remaining alive. It was their delight, their folly, their anodyne, their intellectual stimulant. Where the Lottery was concerned, even people who could barely read and write seemed capable of intricate calculations and staggering feats of memory. There was a whole tribe of men who made their living simply by selling systems, forecasts, and lucky amulets. Winston had nothing to do with the Lottery, which was managed by the Ministry of Plenty, but he was aware (indeed everyone in the party was aware) that the prizes were largely imaginary. Only small sums were actually paid out, the winners of the big prizes being non-existent persons.”

And Then A Revelation...

Yesterday I made a discovery that’ll fundamentally change our lives to an unbelievable extent relating to meal preparation times.

No idea about yours, but the timer on our microwave requires the continual pressing and releasing of a button that, with each press, increases the time in ten second increments. As you can imagine this gets a tad tedious with an item requiring eleven minuets to cook heat-up. Yesterday, purely by accident, my forefinger lingered on the timer button and guess wot? While keeping my finger on the button, the timer shot up  in increments of one minute! Oh bliss!

There’s a mind bogglingly sad sting in the tail of this tale. And that would be? We’ve had the microwave for ten years... On reflection, over those ten years we’ve probably wasted close to eighteen months of our lives repeatedly and unnecessarily pressing a button.

Those wasted eighteen months are, of course, in addition to the sensation you get that you’ve left the accepted scientific understanding of time and entered that weird time bending microwave slow motion dimension whilst watching your microwave clock count down. If you’ve never noticed this spooky aberration in time before, trust me, after reading this, the next time you’re watching and waiting for the ‘ding’, you will. Once your attention is drawn to this micro-time bending concept, there’s no going back so henceforth you’ll curse me every time time seems to stand still while you wait for your microwave to heat your meal. You’ll discover you seem to have time aplenty so to curse. Sorry about that.

As for me, this simple revelation further confirms my belief as to how dumb I really do be. Will I now start  to pay attention to instruction books? Nah.

Quote;  Steven Wright.

“I put instant coffee in a microwave oven and almost went back in time.”