28 Aug 2015

And Then, A Winner….

Further to the 'kidding' competition at the end of the last post, I'm delighted to say A K Haart is the winner! Not only is he the winner, he's the only entrant. How lucky is that then?

He deduced that the correct name for a mentioned e-liquid was French Garlic Soup With A Side Of Onion Bread and NOT as I stated, French Onion Soup With A Side Of Garlic Bread.

Sir, please be informed that a bottle of the afore mentioned e-liquid will be forwarded to you in due course. However, I note from previous comments that you are neither a smoker nor a vaper but please note that the liquid can be used to make actual soup, flavoured as named, and a 10ml bottle will produce approximately 10 gallons of nicotine enriched soup. This is ideal for serving when those long-lost annoying friends, 'friends' you really hoped had finally been lost a long time ago, roll up unannounced.

Rather than turn them away, something you're far too polite to do, however much you may want to, invite them to stay for dinner, and, trust me, after a serving of this soup, cunningly declined by you and yours, you will be heartened to see these 'friends' run, run like the wind, with wind, more than likely never to darken your doorway again. Job done.

As a further note, do not discard any remaining soup, there's likely to be a lot, but rather pour it into an old rubber hot water bottle and freeze. Very handy for use in the extremely unlikely event those long-lost folk find the courage to roll up again some time in the far future.

In other news, I see net migration to the UK, no ifs, no buts, has hit a record high. The governments reaction? To extend the badger cull. That'll work.

Quote;  Portuguese Proverb

“Visits always give pleasure--if not the arrival, the departure.”


A K Haart said...

At last, I've won something. I don't have a rubber hot water bottle to store the excess soup, so would an electric blanket do?

Mac said...

A K Haart,
Thank you for your question regarding your recent competition prize.
Yes, an old fluffy electric blanket would serve well.
Just place the blanket in the soup and allow it to soak it all up. Hang the soup saturated blanket in your garden shed for several days to allow all biological actions to complete then fold and store in a black plastic bag.
To reconstitute the soup, should it be needed, cut the blanket up and slowly feed the strips it into a large pan containing a little boiling water then simply strain and serve. The strainer should be of such a mesh size so as to allow fluff through as this will add ‘body’ to the soup so negating the need to serve bread with the soup course.
I trust this information will help you enjoy your prize to the full.