2 Aug 2016

And Then, That’s A Long Time...

During my ramble around the technical department of this place, and you’d be amazed at the complexities involved in bringing you this rubbish, I checked out the site statistics. Interesting stuff there and thus I’d first off like to say a big Hi, how ya doin’? to my reader in Tajikistan. I wonder if this reader is just popping in on the off chance of finally fathoming out what the hay it’s all about or could this be confirmation that warped humour is, indeed, universal?

Anyhoo, while there, I was both gladdened and saddened to see that, despite shuffling off this mortal coil over a year ago, the good and greatly missed Captain Ranty is still channelling visitors to this place. I just wish you were still with us so I could thank you Sir. Never mind, with time passing with the speed of an ever accelerating express train, I’ll be able to thank you in person soon enough – assuming I end up where wot you be. Assuming I can find you amongst all those folk.

Won’t that be something? Being able to shoot the breeze for all eternity... Wait just one really, really long minute there. Eternity? Is that forever then? Man, that’s a whole hell of a lot of breeze to shoot is it not?

Eternity; hold that thought. Did all those religious writers even think about that concept? Life everlasting? Eternity? Forever? Oh boy, what kind of nutter offers an eternity of doing nothing and calls it a reward? Even those fellows who are ‘promised’ a bunch o’ girls are going to have to learn to pace themselves pretty dramatically to keep it fun for eternity. Or to put it another way, for ever.

Well, will we get to have a hobby or a thousand or five? So, can we have a computer with Windows 10 on it? Keeping that sucker doing what it’s supposed to do will certainly occupy much time, but eternity? You up to that challenge Bill?

No, really, eternity? Time without end? You get the odd day down here when you get bored? That’s a day or two, right? You think boredom may set in after, oh, I don’t know, a slack handful of days of shouting hallelujah hour after hour? Then what? Suck it up for eternity?

Do you think you get to pick your most favourite ever moment from this side and relive it for eternity over there? What’s the betting that favourite moment starts getting a tad un-favourite by the time you’re, what, half way to the end of eternity. Hang on; you can’t get to the end of forever can you? Bummer.

My weekly high point uses both mental agility and physical exercise. Putting the trash out for collection. Mental agility, getting the right colour bin on the right day and physically getting the sucker out to the street. And remembering to physically bring him back in after he’s been emptied of course. Will we get to do that? Without any end?

I wonder wot they look forward to over there. A few days off? Off from what exactly? You remember these words from what seems like an eternity ago, “These places are full of sad, lonely old folk who’ve run out of life before they’ve run out of time.”  And we’re supposed to believe eternity is something to look forward to?

Man, I just can’t wait. Only kidding; I can wait a while. I may change my mind when the day dawns when I can’t get the right trash out on the right day.

Quote;  Maximus Freeman.

“The truth about forever is that it never gets any closer or farther away.”


Caratacus said...

But surely as an Englishman you are familiar with Lord Mancroft's observation, “Cricket is a game which the English, not being a spiritual people, have invented to give themselves some conception of eternity.”

For myself I've always privately thought that us true immortals live our lives in the eternal present between the future, which hasn't happened yet, and the past, which has gone. There's a curious sort of .. steadiness .. to be had in that imaginary space :-)

Mac said...

Love the cricket quote and yup, it’s new to me.
A lifetime ago, when I was on man’s boat, we used to bob into Japan and I always remember their saying, back then, when anything was looking a little iffy; “Never mind. Tomorrow may never happen.”
Many years later, in Vietnam, if things weren’t progressing quite to plan, they would say, “Never mind. If job not finished today, there’s always tomorrow.”
Never mind, just take your pick and use whichever you feel is appropriate for the prevailing situation because, as you say, today is all we really have.