And Then, A Fashion Statement….

Today I realised I just couldn't take anymore of her indoors bullying and harassment that's been directed at me almost hourly over the past many days so I surrendered and we went shopping for new trousers for me.

Personally, I see absolutely nothing wrong with these trousers. They protect my legs, cover my dangly bits and, despite their age, have no patches and, to me, look okay. In a nutshell, they work. I have the same attitude towards shoes, another item I'm continually 'encouraged' to renew. My defence is always the same; they're shiny where shiny is important, and you can't see through the bottom.

As a last argument I resort to the simple fact that if I attempted to replenish my miniscule wardrobe, at the same frenetic pace as wot her do, there would be less funds available to continue the never ending task of overfilling her wardrobe with stuff, stuff like the essential new winter coat purchased weeks ago and yet to come off the hanger. When I enquire as to when this coat may be worn, I don't get an answer, just that withering woman-look that says, "Don't go there buddy."

She maintains these trousers are just too old. Way too old. In this she has a point as the newest pair are now getting on for twelve and the others in my extensive wardrobe of three pairs, are many years older.

I have to say I've never been a great slave to fashion with my last foray into it being many, many years ago when I decided the fad at that time, cardigans and white socks, would make me look cool. In the real world they actually made me look a prat and where quickly ditched for more conservative apparel although the prat part was probably still visible to the discerning eye.

Anyhoo, off to the shops we went. The choosing was quick and painless but after finding an assistant with a tape measure, just to confirm my waist was still that of a fit young racing snake, I was a tad saddened to learn I now needed a waist size of thirty-six inches.

Upon trying a pair on I was amazed how comfortable they felt and quietly reflected that this new stuff was possibly quite  a good idea after all and thought of all the years I'd been struggling to fasten trousers with a waist of thirty-two inches round my ever expanding bulky body.

From thirty-two to thirty-six. Damn!! Even with exercise. Yes, I do exercise because however technically advanced cars may be now, what with automatic parking, navigation and that stop/start engine stuff, they're still incapable of collecting you from the sofa and so I'm obliged to walk to the damn thing. And let's not forget the arduous walk back from the car to the sofa later.

At the end of the day, well done her. I have comfort again. This obviously calls for a celebratory mega fry-up!!

In other news, over at Underdogs, it's sad to see the author and many of the commenters are looking forward with excitement to the general election. As, indeed, am I. And isn't that a sad reflection on life in this grey overall of a country we live in that the best thing we have to look forward to with any excitement is to watch people counting bits of paper in the early morning hours. Other than buying trousers that is. Oh, I've already done that for the decade……

Quote;  Jarod Kintz.

“I got fat, and I decided to do something about it, so I got fatter.”