27 Aug 2014

And Then, No Connection….

No, not the WLAN problems of the past;** this was Skype. ‘Skype can’t connect’. {Only on the Windows 7 desk-top by the way.} Further down, in blue, ‘Help with this problem’. Worth a click I think. First up is the old favourite, ‘Shutdown the program and try again in two minutes.’ That didn’t work so what’s the alternative? ‘Contact your IT Administrator.’ Right, I can do that.
”G’day. How are I today?”
”I’m fine thanks. And me?”
”I’m good too. So, how can I help me?”
”Skype won’t connect.”
”have I tried shut…..”
”Yup. Didn’t work.”
”Sorry, I can’t help me then.”
”Is that the best I can offer me?”
”Yup, that it is.”
”Damn! Thank me anyway.”
”I’m welcome. And I hope I have a nice day.”
”And I. Bu-by.”

I use Skype version 4 as I also have VOIP DECT phones and learned a long time ago that they are no longer supported, driver wise, by the manufacturer and version 4 was the last compatible Skype release wot worked.

What to do. Do what we all do in such situations. Trawl Google, select the most complex, restore pointing, firewall shutdowning, registry modifying, deleting, re-installing, time consuming cure to the connection problem and have at it.

As pretty much expected, no joy.

Hay!! How about a new account? Went through the hoops only to be informed, and I kind o’ knew this was coming, Skype can’t connect at this time.

After a couple or three hours I thought, well that’s it. It’s dead in the water on this machine so I may as well load the latest desktop version and put the phone drivers on a laptop for VOIP DECT phoning, via Skype, for her indoors to call family and friends in far, far, far away places.

This I did and guess what? The latest version of Skype connected straight away. Guess what again? The VOIP phones worked straight away. I’m guessing you’ve guessed what the last ‘guess what’ is. I started ‘trouble shooting’ at the two hour hard end and worked slowly back to the two minute easy end. Why do we – okay – I always seem to do that?

** I may not have mentioned wot MAY have been the WLAN problem of old. Just before the laptop went for a few away-days, her indoors said, above my cursing the laptop, “Wot is small led light on scleen then?” That’s ‘red’ and ‘screen’ by the way.

Under the coffee table, lying there unused, was a wireless mouse. So? So it was still switched on and the ‘on’ light was reflecting in the screen. Switching him off was the moment the WLAN service started starting at start-up. So was that the cause? Was the mouse hunting for it’s dongle and causing WLAN conflicts? I have no idea but since switch-off no further problems were, or have been,
encountered. No, I haven’t tried replicating the issue.

In other surprise news today an RBS person, commenting on the fine imposed on the bank for their lamentable mortgage advice, states that lessons have been learned. Meanwhile, in Rotherham, ‘Shaun of the Left’ states he won’t be resigning as he believes he’s doing a bang-up job and anyway lessons have been learned. So there you go; ‘lessons learned’ wins the day yet again. But let’s not forget the ever popular  runners-up, ‘drawing lines’ and  ‘going forward’. Six meaningful words formed into three meaningless phrases.

Quote;  Scott Douglas.

“I am convinced that grandkids are inherently evil people who tell their grandparents to "just go to the library and open up an e-mail account - it's free and so simple.”


Ripper said...

I love this blog Mac, you just crack me up!

Mac said...

I use this Moody Blues line way too much but it just works; face piles of trials with smiles; {It riles them to believe that you perceive the web they weave. And keep on thinking free.}
Slide along to about 1.10
Be well my friend.

A K Haart said...

I don't understand how Shaun of the Left lands such good jobs when there are so many lessons he hasn't learned.

Ripper said...

I'm off work this week with a trapped nerve in the shoulder, its kinda taken out my left arm. So am sitting there trying to ignore the excrutiating pain, then saw the conversation with your IT Admin. That did it, just fell about laughing and forgot it hurt. You have one heck of a sense of humour Mac.

That sounds like a great album, its a long time since I heard anything from them so I'm going to see if the whole album is available to listen to. It sounds very different to the 'Forever Autumn' days though. Thanks for the pointer.

Anonymous said...

Similar rigmarole with WhatsApp customer service. Their software has been running fine on a steam driven Blackberry for months, but now causes it to crash. They insist its soluble by reading their FAQ page and/or reinstalling the software and refuse to accept the futility of this erroneous advice. Dinosaurs don't rule after all.

The Admiral

Mac said...

Mr Haart,
I know what you mean. One thing always comes across when these types are interviewed; they can talk. They may know nothing but all seem to be absolute masters of ducking and diving, bobbing and weaving to protect themselves.

Mac said...

I do hope your falling about didn’t make your shoulder any worse!!
I’m sure you’ve found the album by now but just in case;
Get well soon - as they say.

Mac said...

FAQ pages - don’t you just love ‘em? Here’s a thought. How many times have we sat in front of our computers of a rainy afternoon with nothing meaningful to do and thought, “This machine works just fine but I wonder if I move that folder to there and do that registry hack trick this computer will run faster.” Only to find, next time we boot up, “Whoops. Well, that didn’t work. Now, what the hell did I change?”
Could programmers and coders, on a slow day, be just the same? “This software works just fine but I wonder, if I change these 2000 lines of code......”

Ripper said...

I do have the full album now Mac. You may know about this already, but may I introduce you to Songr (for Windoze). Its a cloud player that queries 16 search engines for whatever you are looking for. It has a search by lyrics function (minimum search 3 words), will display the lyrics of the song as its playing, and if you like what you hear there is also a download button (places downloaded songs in My Music/Songr). There is also a function for downloading whole albums. It is very handy I find, for finding rare or deleted music, or that track who's name is on the tip of your tongue. And its freeware.

Get it from here:

At the top of the page you will see Option1 and Option2. Ignore these and go for the portable version below the options buttons. To install simply create a new folder, unpack the zip file into it then right click on the executable file and choose 'Send To > Desktop as Shortcut' from the popup menu. Enjoy.

Mac said...

I knew you'd find the album.
Thanks for the Songr tip; it's appreciated. I'll download and give it a whirl this evening.
Be cool my friend.