2 Aug 2013

And Then A New Wind Farm....

On the local BBC news last night.... was it last night or the night before; what is this thing called ‘time’? How come it crawls along in second gear when you’re young and finally finds fifth when you’re old?

Anyhoo, that nice young lad Nick Clegg was on TV opening a new offshore wind farm. So farm, so good. Other than the chosen accompanying film seemed to show only one of many peperellars actually peperellering.

What jumped out of the BBC ‘on message’ presenters reportage was his declaration that this farm will produce enough electrickery to power 200,000 homes. If you where new to Earth this would suggest a pretty good deal. However, If it had been reported just a tad more factually it would quickly loose a lot of its gloss.

There was not a word of the requirement for conventional generation as back-up and, scarily, no mention of the need for wind! A wind which would have to blow consistently at the speed the windmills were designed to optimally generate at.

I see it’s slightly amended on the BBC web sight to. “The 75 turbines are capable of producing enough energy for 200,000 homes.”

If a bumble bee, that superbly aerodynamic insect, can fly you’d assume we must be capable of flight, right? I’m capable of typing at one hundred and one words a minute, but, as Mitch Hedberg says, ”..... it's in my own language.” I’m capable of laying bricks but a bricky does it so much better. Too late now, they’re out there, cluttering up the continental shelf, altering the currents resulting in the dumping of tons of sand in the centre of the close coastal towns.

Nick, I also noted you’ve picked up that irritating habit from your very bestest friend ever, Dave. Know the one I mean? Oh, sorry, yes I know you know Dave. I meant know the habit. It’s that ol’ mouth before brain thingy, yet again.

Calling voters who don’t fully go along with your views ‘Luddites’ is not very polite coming from an expensively educated lad like you is it?

May I suggest, as you tear along the highway at break-neck speed that you cool your jets, pull into the layby of thought, stretch your legs, give your head a little shake, check all your lights are on, make sure full beam works, then slowly pull out into grown-up traffic and proceed at a respectable speed with your brain set to ‘On’ and mouth to ‘Off’.

As for your green energy ideas - with any luck you left ‘em in the trash-can at the layby.

Quote; Bernard M. Baruch.

“Most of the successful people I’ve known are the ones who do more listening than talking.”

  Lemony Snicket. {Daniel Handler.}

“If writers wrote as carelessly as some people talk, then adhasdh asdglaseuyt[bn[ pasdlgkhasdfasdf.”

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