18 Jun 2010

And Then I Found A Herd Of…..

It being a sunny, warmy day yesterday, I took a wander round the garden, communicating with nature an’ that. It seems the growy stuff is behind schedule this year. There’s lots of green stuff but very little sign of those coloured, nice smelly things that pop out at the ends of all the green stuff. Those watch-ama-call-em things. Flowers! That's it, flowers!

Mr. Topsy? ‘Nuff said about him.

However, I did notice that I have, quite possibly, one of the finest herds of free range snails in the country. So vast and majestic is this herd, I was wondering if I could open the garden to the public, for a modest entrance fee, as a petting farm. No French kids of course. But that’s only common sense.

I’m only guessing, but thought there may well be some sort of regulation that’d prevent me from doing this. I’m only guessing. On the off chance there is, indeed, some form of “You Can’t Do That” regulation, I went for the alternative. Not wanting to commit genocide on the herd, hay, they’ve as much right to slither around as I have, but not wanting them to use the garden as a running buffet, I carefully collected them, bagged them, walked down the road and liberated them in open country choosing a shady spot close to a babbling brook.

It was a joy to watch them excitedly scampering about, squealing with delight as they explored their new surroundings.

After shaking that picture out of my head, and after watching them for twenty minutes and not spotting any sign of movement in the herd, I wandered home just happy in the knowledge I had given the little guys a great new place to hang out.

Strangely, as I left, a couple of wide eyed, dribbling hedgehogs scampered by me. They must have had their sights set on something special as they didn’t give me so much as a glance. And what’s with all the crows all of a sudden? It’s funny what goes on in the countryside is it?

Anyhoo, later, I remembered a radio program I caught a few weeks ago on the riveting subject of – garden snails. The bitty I remembered? It seems these snail beasties are home lovers and will find their way ‘home’ from as far away as two miles. Given time, I guess. Apparently, this radio presenting, snail talking about person spends their days marking snails in their garden, moving them ever further from ‘home’ and then waits to see when they get back. Wadda’ya think of that? Yea, same as me then.

Quote; Charles H. Spurgeon

“By perseverance, the snail reached the ark.”

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