Each year I say to myself this is the last yearly contract I'm having for a mobile phone. I've paid for this one, it works, so lets go pay-as-you- go. Then, at end of contract time, it's like some form of subliminal mind game kicks in, and it's off to the shop to see what's new. Totally automatic.
And there I was, at the counter. What do you ask for in a phone shop? A phone, right? That's what I thought. It don't work. The 16 year old sales person launched into what sounded like jibberish to me and all I picked up was that all the phones have ace cameras. I explained that I had a camera, thank you, and the idea of this shopping expedition was to purchase an item that would receive and send telephone calls. Again the 16 year old sales person launched into incomprehensible techno babble. At this point I had to stop the 16 year old sales person, apologize and explain that I had foolishly left my Buck Rogers Decoder Ring at home and thus had not the foggiest idea what he was talking about.
I tried one more time asking for just a phone, nothing else, no wifi, no G3, no WW2, GPS, no tele porting, no death ray, just a phone. The result of this was the 16 year old sales person looking at me blankly, wondering why anyone would want only a phone and me looking at the 16 year old sales person blankly wondering why anyone would want to tele port to Venus by phone. Or by any other method come to that. No air there is there? For heavens sake!!
"If you don't take the full package you won't get your 200 free SMS's a month."
"I'll learn to live without them, thanks." said I, having no idea what I was going to have to learn to live without, but just working on the assumption that I had got this far without 200 free SMS's a month so it should be no problem now.
End result? They don't make phones any more so I settled for a multi-media this and that with the multi-media and all the this and that disabled. A phone.
I did ask if I could keep the death ray but it seems you have to take the full multi-media and all the this and that package to get the death ray. Would've been nice though..............
By this time the 16 year old sales person had totally lost interest in me and had switched his attention to the next customer in line who he could sense would be more receptive to his techno babble. This being an 8 year old straight out of the tattoo and piercing parlor. Her boyfriend was a sight as well.
Quote;
"A boy can learn a lot from a dog; obedience, loyalty, and the importance of turning round three times before lying down."
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