8 May 2018

And Then, More Lunacy...

I saw the news this morning that some fellow by the name of Willetts has come to the conclusion that everyone turning twenty-five should be given ten thousand pounds. Surprisingly, this isn’t free money but will come from hitting the elderly who made sacrifices to save a bit. Sacrifices it seems the millennials aren’t prepared to make. I have a better idea and if nothing else, would make a welcome break from those water adverts showing some kid having to walk four miles a day because their dads too dumb to move their shack closer to the water. How about Help A Millennial?

We’ve all heard of the heart wrenching plight of so many millennials who are seeing the flow of so much free stuff starting to dry up and also the devastating effect the slight shift in political correctness is having on their safe space natural habitat. Now you can help us to protect a millennial from the harsh realities of the real world by donating just ten pounds a month.

Your ten pounds will go towards ensuring no millennial will EVER be in the embarrassing position of having to use last years smartphone. They’ll also receive a big ‘You Are The Very Best Ever’ badge. Your donation will also help us to preserve their safe spaces where they’ll be  sheltered from any form of offence and thus free to frolic and play the live-long day without a care in the world and be able to concentrate on refining their makeup, their hair colour, compare tatts, take selfies and post them to every known site on the Inter-Web twenty-four seven.

As part of your welcome pack, you’ll receive a cuddly miniature millennial and get  monthly updates from you’re millennial. {Included in the pack will be a translation sheet from millennial to English.} The pack will also entitle you to free text alerts in the unlikely event they find useful and gainful employment or if they manage, totally unaided, to open a bank savings account. Many thanks for helping to support a snowflake.

Yeah, I know but is that idea any more ‘out there’ than the idea of Willy-Wallet-Willetts?

There’s a nice bit on this site – “Maybe if we tell ‘em their brain’s an App they’ll start using it.”

Quote;  Ramesh Lohia.

“Millennials (aka Generation Y) are great at social media (Facebook, Google+, LinkedIn, Twitter,Tumblr, Instagram, Flickr, Snapchat, Pinterest, YouTube, Vimeo, and Periscope) but lack time tested social skills (patience, humility, active listening, respect for parents, teachers, elderly).”


Caratacus said...

Don't know about you, Mac, but when I read of these poor ickle snowflakes I am reminded of Edward the Black Prince at the battle of Crecy. "At the height of the battle the Black Prince's division was particularly hard-pressed during the fighting. When reinforcements were requested from Edward, the king famously said; "I am confident he will repel the enemy without my help. Let the boy win his spurs". The Prince was sixteen years old. Or John Cornwell VC (RN) at the Battle of Jutland - sixteen again. The snowflakes are not representative of the yoof of today, I am sure!

Mac said...

I’m also sure you’re right. Sadly, it’s only the flaky ones that get into the public eye. Also true of so many nutty fringe and ‘I want and demand NOW!’ groups - they all seem to get publicity and attention way beyond anything that could possibly be warranted. This, in a way, is good as it never fails to produce a smile.