10 Apr 2018

And Then, I’m Nudged...

I have to say the new sugar tax has completely ‘nudged’ me but possibly not in the intended direction. They’ve nudged the low esteem I already held those that would rule over us in right off the low esteem chart.

I believe this tax is to cut obesity; primarily in the young, right? You may remember I did a little research a little bit after a while ago as I live in close proximity to a large primary school thus I’m able to observe the little darlings as the go to and leave school. My observational study would seem to suggest that approximately one in a hundred of these kids shows a very slight sign of puppy fat. No fatso epidemic there then.

Further to this, I popped into a rather large burger joint the other day and as it was lunchtime and the Easter school holidays the place was heaving with primary school age kids with parents or grandparents all filling their precious tummies with huge burgers and generous helpings of extruded fries, fizzy drinks, shakes and ice cream with the grownups grabbing fists full of those three grain sugar sachets. This didn’t seem like a holiday ‘special treat’ as those kids knew exactly what they wanted without recourse to the photo menu. Guess wot. Not a fatty in sight. Not one. Not even a slightly tubby one.

Sadly, I have no idea how to get my study into a scientific journal.

And the latest ‘leaders’ nuttery in the face of rising knife crime? It’ll become illegal to buy a knife online. Sorted. That’ll scare the pants of those bad fellows. Go get ‘em Rudderless! Strangely, it seems like only a paragraph ago I was typing about children...

And what do we know? We just know that within two years they’ll be coming for our pointy forks and then spoons soon thereafter. Hay, hang on a sickly sweet minute there. Let’s tell ‘em to do spoons before forks so that the spoon ban can combine with the ‘sugar is jolly bad’ message. No, really; you ever tried putting three spoons of sugar in you coffee using a fork?  Oh, yes!! We have a winner!

Quote;  Ralph Nader.

“If God hadn't meant for us to eat sugar, he wouldn't have invented dentists.”

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