2 Jul 2014

And Then The Return….

She be back, which reminded me of this Far Side cartoon…..

farside01

I’d also like to let all you husbands out there know that when a long awaited program finally arrived on TV and I switched on in eager anticipation, I was a tad disappointed to discover it was a kids cartoon and NOT a husbands educational program as I expected. So, unless you enjoy cartoons, avoid ‘How To Train Your Dragon’.

Anyhoo, with the last missed bit of the projects and the cleaning-up completed she went on a tour of inspection and I waited for the usual woman thing which usually kicks off with, “When you did that bit, why didn’t you……”. Much to my amazement, all the projects were greeted with high praise! I know, it shook me as well.

However, come daylight and she took a walk round the garden things changed somewhat.

As I’ve been at pains to point out in the past I’m not a great gardener. To me a weed is just an underrated flower which is super easy to grow, requiring no effort from other hands, produce some lovely flowers and seed themselves copiously ready for next year. How cool can it get? This simple view isn’t, sadly, shared by her in the garden.

“Why you not take out weeds? They be big now.”
”Yes, they are big but consider this….”
”What ‘consider’ mean?”
”Think about this….”
”Why you not just say ‘think’ first time?”
”No idea. Think about this. when weeds first show, they’re really small, right?”
”Light.”
“Light? Oh, right. Well, that
means for me to pull them up I have to do my back bending thing, or worse, that kneeling and back bending  thing; an attitude which takes seconds to assume but anything up to a week to straighten up from. As I considered this – thinked about this, I thunk, why the hell not let them grow to a size where I can just walk sedately round the garden and just pull the fellows out o’ the ground and do away with all that bending and crawling and rolling about stuff.”
”I think about it and get back to you.”
”Cool.”

I’m quietly confident I haven’t totally got away with this one. We’ll see in time.

Quote;  Tommy Cooper.

A woman tells her doctor, 'I've got a bad back.' The doctor says, 'It's old age.' The woman says, 'I want a second opinion.' The doctor says: 'Okay - you're ugly as well.'

2 comments:

A K Haart said...

Maybe it's worth dropping hints about eco-gardening where weeds are our friends and have the same rights as non-weeds. Diversity could come into it too.

Mac said...

I'll try. I did try the old standby 'weeds attract wildlife' but she insisted she had all the wildlife she could handle with me.