9 Dec 2012

And Then, Animal Rights….

Her indoors was watching a cooking program on TV the other day, and let's be honest, they're awful hard to avoid, when I became aware of the story below being recounted in the first person.  It's so old I'd forgotten it and laughed out loud, as did my little nest of vipers - an hour later when I'd managed to explain it to her.

This is probably the first shaggy dog story I ever heard and could be the perfect tale, told in the first person, for after the Christmas fare when the port and sherry bottles are running on empty.  A tad more entertaining than watching The Guns Of Navarone for the thirtieth time.

A guy was walking through the countryside when he came across an old well.  He looked down the well and seeing nothing, wondered how deep it was.

He threw a stone down the well but heard no sound at all.  Intrigued, he found a larger stone and threw that down the well with the same result.  No sound. 

He's now determined to solve this little mystery and searches in the bushes for something big and heavy to turf down the well so he can hear a splash or crash.

Eventually he found a large lump of timber, probably an old rail track sleeper, and with a struggle he dragged the timber to the well wall, lifter one end to the top of the wall, grabbed the other end and managed to tip the timber down the well.

At that precise moment, out of the corner of his eye, he saw a wild eyed billy goat, lowering his head as he charged straight at him. 

In a split second the guy jumped to the side and the goat missed him, leapt the wall and disappeared down the well. 

As the guy's looking down the well in amazement, disbelief and relief, a farmer wanders through the bushes, sees the guy and asks, "Have you seen a goat around here?"
With eyes downcast the guy replies, "A goat?  Err, no, sorry."
"Never mind," says the farmer,
"I'll find him.  He can't go far.  I've got him tied to an old rail track sleeper."

Quote;  Stephen Fry.
"I think animal testing is a terrible idea. They get all nervous and give silly answers."

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