3 Dec 2011

And Then, Read And Learn….

While scouring an old hard drive, I ran into this little gem. Hope it gives you a Saturday smile. If you only learn one thing from this, it should be; Keep your clubs locked up!

Before you start, have you caught that snatch of old song doing the TV advert rounds? Click, or if you're on a laptop, tappy-tap that touch-pad looking thingy, with your arrow, on the arrow in the box below to hear that infuriatingly catchy tune by Mr Formby. I'm sure you'll find yourself drifting back to less complicated times and to become surrounded with warm, happy memories. You know what? Let's dedicate it to Susie……

It's important for men to remember that, as women grow older, it becomes harder for them to maintain the same quality of housekeeping as when they were younger.

When you notice this, try not to yell at them. Some are over sensitive, and there's nothing worse than an over sensitive woman.

My name is Jeff. Let me relate how I handled the situation with my wife, Susie.

Since I retired several years ago, it's become necessary for Susie to get a full-time job along with her part-time job, both for extra income and for the health insurance benefits that we needed.

Shortly after she started working, I noticed she was beginning to show her age. I usually get home from the golf club about the same time she gets home from work.

Although she knows how hungry I am, she almost always says she has to rest for half an hour or so before she starts dinner. I don't yell at her. Instead, I tell her to take her time and just wake me when she gets dinner on the table. I generally have lunch in the Men's Grill at the club so eating out is costly and not reasonable and I'm ready for some home-cooked grub when I hit that door.

She used to do the dishes as soon as we finished eating. But now it's not unusual for them to sit on the table for several hours after dinner. I do what I can by diplomatically reminding her several times each evening that they won't clean themselves. I know she really appreciates this, as it does seem to motivate her to get them done before she goes to bed.

Another symptom of aging is complaining, I think. For example she will say that it's difficult for her to find time to pay the monthly bills during her lunch hour.

But, boys, we take 'em for better or worse, so I just smile and offer encouragement. I tell her to stretch it out over two or even three days. That way she won't have to rush so much. I also remind her that missing lunch completely now and then wouldn't hurt her any (if you know what I mean). I like to think tact is one of my strong points.

When doing simple jobs, she seems to think she needs more rest periods. She had to take a break when she was only half finished mowing the lawn. I try not to make a scene. I'm a fair man. I tell her to fix herself a nice, big, cold glass of freshly squeezed lemonade and just sit for a while and, as long as she is making one for herself, she may as well make one for me too.

I know that I probably look like a saint in the way I support Susie. I'm not saying that showing this much consideration is easy. Many men will find it difficult. Some will find it impossible! Nobody knows better than I do how frustrated women get, as they get older.

However, guys, even if you just use a little more tact and less criticism of your aging wife because of this article, I will consider that writing this was well worthwhile.

After all, we're put on this earth to help each other, right?




Jeff died suddenly on October 1 of a perforated rectum. The police report says he was found with a Calloway fifty inch Big Bertha Driver II golf club jammed up his rear end, with barely 5 inches of grip showing and a sledge hammer laying nearby.

His wife Susie was arrested and charged with murder. The all-woman jury took only fifteen minutes to find her Not Guilty, accepting her defense that Jeff, somehow, without looking, accidentally sat on his golf club.

Quote; Franklin P. Jones.

All women should know how to take care of children. Most of them will have a husband some day.

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