Same-same last post;
After sauntering round the store, change tack and proceed purposefully to the check-out knowing full well there is something not in the basket that should be in the basket, but, well, there you go.
Finally, after queuing for what seems like several lifetimes, and with the basket contents on the conveyor, on the bit where milk, flour and treacle have just been spilt, I shuffle slowly towards the Scanning and Till Opening, Closing Technician.
It’s my turn next and I’m trying not to notice the PIN number of the person in front of me. And why, oh why, when I’m so very close to the end game, does the person in front of me always have card problems? Wrong way in, upside down, twenty goes to get the right PIN. Start again with another card. Offering advice in our modern world is just greeted with black scowls, as it seems to be tantamount to an attempted mugging, so keep it zipped and study the two hundred types of chewing gum on display and wonder, why me? So close. It’s just not fair.
At last it’s my turn. Not to be so quick about it there you customer person! I’m informed that I need a score of seventy percent or above, from the following questions, or the till stays closed.
Do I have a Nectar card? Do I have a points card? Do I want a points card? Why not? Do I want to top up my mobile phone? Do I want any cash back? Do I have proof of age as I’m buying mature cheese? Am I using my own bags today? {A ‘No’ to this question is fast becoming unacceptable which just strengthens my resolve to always say, loudly, ‘No’.} Do I need help packing? Do I need a car park ticket stamping? Is it still raining?
Eventually it’s done. The Scanning and Till Opening, Closing Technician informs me that the bill is twelve pounds twenty-eight pence. I fumble in my pockets, mumbling, and then, “I have the two pounds twenty-eight pence; do you have the ten?”
The more elderly Scanning and Till Opening, Closing Technicians will, after a pause, chuckle.
The younger Scanning and Till Opening, Closing Technicians will nervously look around for their supervisor.
Quote; Ann Landers.
“Anyone who believes the competitive spirit in America is dead has never been in a supermarket when the cashier opens another checkout line.”
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