I can't watch the news. Are the children 'running' the country going to throw more of our money out the pram? By that, I mean, are they going to loan shed loads more money to throw out the pram? By that, I mean, have the kiddies found another magic money tree? Let me know if we ever get grown-ups in charge again and I can come out from under the bed covers. Thanks.
By-the-by, where's that nice Mr Hunhatic? Down Durban doing the dirty? Did he drive down? I see he's done the dirty here…… Really, this guy is seriously nuts. Can't we get 'em all sectioned under the Mental Health Act or something?
You know what? I seriously believe any of Walt Disney's characters could run the country with more success than the louts in long trousers we've been blessed with. Of any colour.
Instead of getting too teeth grindingly annoyed, here's a selection of little known Murphy's Laws. Skip ahead first, click-click, listen and read. Assuming you're not in charge of something in government and can, indeed, listen and read simultaneously.
1. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
2. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
3. Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.
4. Nothing is fool proof to a sufficiently talented fool.
5. The 50-50-90 rule: Any time you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.
6. If you lined up all the cars in the world end to end, someone would be stupid enough to try to pass them, five or six at a time, on a hill, in the fog.
7. The things that come to those who wait will be the rubbish left by those who didn't wait.
8. The shin bone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room.
9. A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.
10. When you go into court, you are putting yourself into the hands of 12 people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty.
2. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
3. Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.
4. Nothing is fool proof to a sufficiently talented fool.
5. The 50-50-90 rule: Any time you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.
6. If you lined up all the cars in the world end to end, someone would be stupid enough to try to pass them, five or six at a time, on a hill, in the fog.
7. The things that come to those who wait will be the rubbish left by those who didn't wait.
8. The shin bone is a device for finding furniture in a dark room.
9. A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.
10. When you go into court, you are putting yourself into the hands of 12 people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty.
Quote; ??
"A cross-section survey of 5000 people in the UK, made up of Afghans, Pakistanis, Indians, Poles, Iraqis, Somalis, Africans, Albanians, Bosnians, Turks, Geordies, Brummies, Aberdonians and Liverpudlians were asked if they thought Britain should change its currency to the Euro. 99% said no, they were happy with the Giro."
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