And Then, Very Old…

   Whilst rummaging through very old paperwork I ran into an old printout of a photocopy of a document entitled Engineers. After reading it I thought that, with minimal rewording, it could be yet another item wot could apply to those wot would rule over us. Especially the summary. See wot you think. Let’s get a copy over to Ed Minibrain, eh? 
   Apologies{?} to any engineers who may stumble through this here mirror. 

1.   When you don’t know what you are doing, do it              neatly.
2.   Experience is directly proportional to the quantity
      of equipment ruined or destroyed.
3.   Past experience is always true, never be misled by        present facts.
4.   In case of doubt, make it sound convincing.
5.   Do not believe in miracles, rely on them.
6.   Teamwork is essential, it allows you to blame                someone else.
7.   Recording of data is essential, it indicates you have        been doing something.
8.   No matter what result is anticipated, someone will          always fit facts to it.
9.   No matter what happens, there is always someone        who believes it happened according to his pet                theory.
10. The probability of an event occurring is inversely            proportional to its desirability.
11. The quantity which when added to, subtracted from,divided into, multiplied by the result obtained experimentally will give the correct result, is known
as a constant.
12. Experiments must be reproducible, they should              always fail in the same way.
13. If an experiment works, you must be using the              wrong equipment.
14. An experiment may be considered successful if no          more than half of the data must be discarded to obtain agreement with your pet theory.
15. For neatness, always draw the curves first, and              afterwards plot the data.
16. If an experiment is a complete failure it can always        be used as a bad example.                                                                     Summary:
                       When In Charge? Ponder.
                       When In Trouble? Delegate.
                       When In Doubt? Mumble.

And now I'm wondering if I've posted the above before in the distant past... 

 Quote; Scott Adams.

“Engineers like to solve problems. If there are no problems handily available, they will create their own problems.”