The other day I had a communication from the very good friend I ran into a little bit after a while ago. Could I help him with a laptop problem, a problem he went on to explain. A problem totally new to me. Never mind; he wants help from me? Help with a computer problem? He’s asking me for help? Is he nuts?
If he is nuts, whatever suggestions I pass along, whatever the result, he won’t care will he? Him being nuts an’ all, so a couple of ideas is wot I communicated right back.
Later, he informed me that neither ‘fix’ fixed anything. I didn’t want to appear too simple so I passed on that ol’ power button and Mr F8 tappy-tap-tap trick which should get you to a menu of wondrous fixy-type choices. Below is his reply after trying the F8 tip;
Tried pressing F8 relentlessly, after 4 minutes, massive explosion, 2 ladies in shop ran out, clothes on fire, they ran in front of double-decker bus, driver skidded, bus ploughed into a file of school children, all killed, bus toppled over onto burning old ladies from shop, shop also in flames now, partner upstairs screaming from window, ambulance men putting me on stretcher, drove away, siren wailing, screams from window now getting quieter, can't keep eyes open, think I'm fading, I'll try to lift myyyssell..... uuuup. Good byyyyeeee, fuuucccckkkkkiiiinnnnnggg F8. If I live, do you think F7 would be better? Visiting time is 7 to 8. I’ll be on floor ‘F’.
Me? Three things represented by the letters A, B and, cunningly, C. Let’s start with, oh, I don’t know, A) He aint gettin’ no grapes. B) I’m going off the grid and into deep cover ‘till this fiasco blows over. If it worked for Mr Snowden, I’m sure I can make it work for me, myself and I. C) The morale of this story? A friend in need is best avoided.
Quote; Wernher Von Braun
“The best computer is a man, and it’s the only one that can be mass-produced by unskilled labour.”
“If the automobile had followed the same development as the computer, a Rolls Royce would today cost $100, get a million miles per gallon, and explode once a year killing everyone inside.”