31 Dec 2010

And Then It Was A New Eve….

This came clattering into my in-box on Christmas morning. Thank you Eddy. Here it is for New Year. It may be worth keeping for future use as our old time accepted forms of greeting become less and less acceptable as the years slide by. Never-the-less, for old times sake, Happy New Year!!
I wanted to send some sort of holiday greeting to my friends and colleagues, but it's difficult in today's world to know exactly what to say without offending someone. So I met with my lawyer yesterday, and on advice I wish to say the following;
Please accept, with no obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress, non addictive, gender neutral celebration of the winter solstice holiday practised with the most enjoyable traditions of religious persuasion or secular practices of your choice with respect for the religious/secular persuasions and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all.
I also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2011, but not without due respect for the calendar of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make our country great (not to imply that England is necessarily greater than any other country) and without regard to the race, creed, colour, age, physical ability, religious faith or sexual preference of the wishee.
By accepting this greeting, you are accepting these terms;
This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for him/her or others and is void where prohibited by law, and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher. The wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year or until the issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher.
So there you go, safe and sound with no fault found.
If you enjoyed that, here's something to send you into 2011 with a smile. Hope you enjoy it as much as the News guy.
WARNING!! In line with the above greeting, I must point out that if you're of a genteel disposition and/or averse to naughtiness - please don't be clicking on him. The last thing I want to induce on anyone this New Years eve is an attack of the vapours.
As to be expected from this site, it goes a long way further back than just a little bit after a while ago.... Armageddon!!

Quote; Billy Vaughan.
”Youth is when you're allowed to stay up late on New Year's Eve. Middle age is when you're forced to.”


Captain Ranty said...

Best wishes to you and yours Mac.


Caratacus said...

I've only just been revived from an attack of the vapours...

Fireworks for the New Year!!

All the best for 2011 Old Horse.


Mac said...

likewise Sir. All the best with your endeavours.

Mac said...

Sorry about the vapours. Best wishes and enjoy the fireworks. Armageddon!!